Archive for the ‘nearest and dearest’ Category
Favorite Foto Friday
This time of year always reminds me of the boys, well, men I guess, back home that work on the sea. About this time of year they have already put their gear back in the water and are starting the lobster fishing season. This photo was taken a few years back about this time of year, maybe a little earlier, at my friend’s wharf.
The more I travel and the more people I meet, I’m further and further convinced that there is no one else like the boys back home. I absolutely adore them for that. Furthermore there are fewer prettier places to be in this world than Maine in the summer.
The midcoast of Maine is so unique in it’s picturesque landscape and the core values that remain in the souls of those that continue to occupy the shores. It is such a special, special place to me and will always hold a part of my heart.
I will surely miss Maine this summer but wil smile big knowing if I were to go back the coast and my friends would welcome me as though I had never left.
Vintage Gift
Over the past week I’ve gotten many gifts and cards to celebrate my 26th birthday. They have all brought huge smiles to my face and warmth to my heart from friends and family from across the miles.
One of the coolest gifts I got was sent from my aunts and grandfather.
Two vintage decks of cards in a carved wooden box that my grandfather made with my father to give to my father’s grandmother, my grandmothers’s mother. Did you follow that? I’m not sure if I even got that right!
The decks of cards are from Delta Airlines and say San Francisco and Los Angeles on them, hence why my aunts thought they would be appropriate to send to me.
As someone who adores anything vintage and my family, this was truly an awesome gift! Thank youss!!! 
Favorite Foto Friday
I’m headed out for a fun, pizza-filled birthday celebration so I don’t have time to write much of a caption, but I wanted to get this up! Today is my brother and I’s birthday and obviously, Sunday is Mother’s day. This is my brother and my mother.
We’re not, by any stretch of the imagination, a perfect family, but, man, do we love each other. We fight like crazy but at the end of the day we would do absolutely anything for each other. Anything.
I love you both to pieces! xoxo Love. Loyalty. Friendship.
New Track: Big Tree
I first heard of this awesome little group years ago. My sister went to school with one of the incredibly talented members of the band. I liked them back then, but that was when I was more in a heavier rock stage of my life, not that I don’t still love heavy rock.
Anyway, last time I was home my best friend and I somehow ended up in my sister’s car having a serious dance party to this jam…
I don’t know if it’s the timing of where I’m at with my life, the memory from having so much fun with my sister and co. that night, the fact that Big Tree now resides in SF or the humble happiness the music creates, but I absolutely adore this song.
In this song you can individually hear how each musician contributes his/her talents to the song and yet when you listen to them all together it makes for an even more powerful tune.
In so many ways this song reminds me of moving to California. Yet, it doesn’t make me long for the way my life was when I first put my foot on the gas to leave the East coast. Instead this song acts as a reminder to me that this is the journey. Through the ups and downs life remains so beautiful.
As I’m about to turn 26 I try not to look back. It was a rough year to say the least. I finally feel like I’m at the end of such a dark chapter of my life.
When I came back to San Francisco from Portland last weekend I felt like I was coming home. This is where I’m supposed to be. I have no idea where I’ll be a year from now, nor do a dare venture a guess. To quote the writing on the inside of my Grandma’s memorial service program, “you learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans and futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.”
Moving to California didn’t turn out how I ever imagined it would, yet I know I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be. This song has a fabulous way of reminding me of that.
Backwards with Time
This song is so appropriate for a variety of reasons. I spent the last night I was home with some of my nearest and dearest friends, the Kenney sisters and Jackie. Per usual, there was mucho listening to the Avett Brothers.
Now, en route back to San Francisco I’m having a glass of red wine having just finished a phenomenal book and contemplating the state of my life.
After a constant weekend of being on the go, I am alone, listening to music, writing; I’ve never been more grateful for a six hour flight in my life.
How irrevocably my life has changed in the past 8 months.
“Some say with age our purpose comes clear,
I see the opposite happening here.
Are we losing the fight?
Are we growing backwards with time?”
I used to know exactly what I wanted. I would spend my summers in Rockland hanging out with my friends and family. Eventually I grew restless.
Times changed.
Rockland is no longer a desired place to live for me.
People have changed and most of my friends have moved on.
But when it comes to the matter of family how do we move on? After living several months in San Francisco with a serious lack of love, in comparison to the immense amount of love when surrounded by so many friends and family I have back home in Maine, I was truly humbled on this last trip home just how much lighter life is when you let that much love in.
Spending some time with my brother and his girlfriend I was genuinely envious. My brother, most days, is content and happy with his life. A fisherman who loves a girl, his friends and his family. He spends his free time either hanging out with his best friends, his love or doing handy work for my parents.
A part of me is envious of that. I am envious that it could have so easily been a life I’d chose. A simple life.
However, when it comes to the familiar and the unknown I’ve always chosen the unknown. A part of me is much more comfortable with it.
My question now is: is choosing the unknown a weakness? Is it instead choosing what we know the harder option? Being satisfied with what we know and wanting what we have, not constantly striving to have what we want?
Is my life now a case of wanting what I cannot have? And not wanting what I have? Honestly, I’m not sure.
I know what I have is an incredible heart and love and loyalty for my family and friends but I also know I have a talent as a writer and a love for travel. How do I equally honor both those things?
Sigh.
“I was young and love was fun, now it’s so serious.
Now all the fun has equal pain,
There’s something wrong with this.”
Favorite Foto Friday
Despite today’s post title, I am aware that it is Monday. However, this photograph was taken on Friday, does that count?
Unfortunately it’s not the clearest photo but it is most certainly now one of my favorites. This past weekend we held a memorial service for my grandmother on my mom’s side who passed several months ago. This photo was taken the night before my grandmother’s service at her favorite restaurant.
I cannot put into words how much fun, love and memories were shared with family and friends this weekend. I am feeling truly blessed and at ease by just how much love I have in my life.
Sitting in the airport now catching up on work I’m preparing to completely change gears and get back to life in SF. I’m not sad I’m leaving, for I love my life in California as well. I simply feel at peace that my life is so rich with love despite the miles that keep us physically apart.
Favorite Foto Friday
I woke up this morning to a breaking news alert on my phone from the NYTimes that all Boston residents were on a “lockdown.” As I got on my computer to investigate further as to what had happened now, I called my sister who lives very close to the Cambridge/Watertown line.
Relieved to hear her voice I asked her what the hell was going on. Upon hearing that everything was going down with in blocks of her apartment my anxiety levels started to grow. My sister is fine. But I have never wanted to hug her, hold her and just be with her more.
My sister and I don’t always see eye to eye, in fact, we rarely ever do, but the idea of her being so close to danger is legitimately gut wrenching. I know she’ll be fine and I know that this awful, awful, awful human being will be brought to justice. I believe that because I believe that there is more love and more good in this world than there is hatred and evil.
I know that she will be okay, but what I hope I can remember, is how strong the love I have for her truly is and to continue to embrace that and embody that in our every day conversations and interactions.
My heart is with all of you in Boston.
For Boston
My heart is with all in Boston tonight. I am still at a loss for words. The heartache that I feel for this city I once called home and the many residents whom I still call friends is deep and very real even across the miles. Checking in with friends today I was brought back to Boston in so many ways. I could sense their sadness and fear, but I think President Obama put it best: ”Boston is a tough and resilient town. So are its people.”
So much love for you, Boston. Always. xo.
New Track: Jim James
One of my long-time favorite bands is My Morning Jacket. I frequently come back to their old albums and fall in love with their unique sound all over again. I learned of My Morning Jacket in one of those phases where my sister and I weren’t getting along all that well. She introduced me to them and it totally changed my perspective of her musical tastes.
They are one of those bands that sounds incredible recorded and puts on an equally amazing show usually with lead singer Jim James running around stage. In a cape. He’s awesome.
I was super excited when I learned he was putting out some solo work.
This song really emphasizes Jim James’s voice, which I adore. It’s also got this Paul Simon beat going on in the middle. All in all it’s just a really simple, sweet, upbeat song that displays Jim James’s incredible talents as a musician.
It’s another beautiful day in California and this song only makes my morning that much better. Big smiles.
Favorite Foto Friday
This weekend is the first of two memorial services I have to attend this month for both of my grandmothers. Life sure is funny in the way it works sometimes.
My aunt recently sent me this photo while going through the thousands she has collected over the years. I absolutely love it. It speaks so loudly to exactly who my grandmother was: a kind, gentle and loving person who loved her family so tremendously she would do anything for them.
I think this photo is touching in a grander sense as well. It expresses life so beautifully. My expression being one of curiosity drawn to a piece of my grandmother’s jewelry while my grandmother’s expression is seemingly one of curiosity that life can be so full circle. That this small curious child is quite literally pieces of her.
I wish so badly she could see who I’ve become and advice me in my growing years. I know that’s not how the circle of life works, but I still long for her advice. That being said, I’m very lucky in that I have a father and family who was very close to her and frequently pass her wisdom on to me. Furthermore, I know that all that she was, that loving, loyal and strong person is also within me already and what she would advice me to do I already have the capability to do.
I am so fortunate in that I’ve had very close relationships with most of my grandparents. Without their love and guidance I would certainly not be the young woman I am today.
<3
